Can I Go to Marriage Counselling Alone?
Many individuals ask if it’s acceptable to start marriage counselling on their own, especially if their partner is hesitant or unavailable. The short answer is yes, you can go alone. In fact, seeking support as a single participant can help you gain insights into your relationship, improve communication skills, and explore ways to handle conflicts more effectively.
Rosen Couples Counselling has worked with couples for over 15 years, offering guidance on issues such as infidelity, emotional disconnection, and anger management. But sometimes, a partner might be reluctant to attend, or your schedule may not align. In these cases, attending sessions on your own can still provide valuable growth and understanding.
Related Article: When Is the Right Time for Marriage Counselling?
How Does Solo Marriage Counselling Work?
When you attend marriage counselling without your partner, the focus is on your perspective, experiences, and emotions. A therapist creates a supportive space where you can discuss the challenges you face in your relationship. Together, you explore patterns and behaviours that affect how you and your partner interact, intending to develop healthier ways to respond.
While you won’t have your partner’s direct input, solo sessions still allow you to uncover insights about what could be changed or improved. Your therapist may suggest homework exercises or strategies that you can apply to conversations and day-to-day interactions.
Even one person making conscious efforts can influence the dynamics at home.
Reasons to Attend Without Your Partner
Sometimes one spouse is ready to take the counselling leap, while the other isn’t sure or can’t commit right now. Going solo doesn’t mean you won’t see meaningful results. Here’s why attending on your own can still lead to positive change.
- Partner Hesitation: Sometimes one person is ready to try therapy, while the other isn’t quite there. Rather than waiting, you can take the first step alone.
- Scheduling Conflicts: Work shifts or commitments might stop you both from attending at the same time. Going by yourself keeps the momentum going until your partner can join.
- Personal Growth: Individual therapy is a chance to work on communication skills, emotional awareness, and better coping methods. This can lead to positive changes in the relationship.
- Exploring Uncertainty: If you’re unsure whether counselling is right for your marriage, attending a few sessions alone can help clarify your goals.
Potential Challenges
Attending marriage counselling on your own can still bring valuable insights, but there may be roadblocks. Certain concerns benefit from a two-sided discussion, and you won’t have on-the-spot input from your spouse. Below are a few hurdles to keep in mind:
Lack of Immediate Partner Feedback
Without your partner in the session, you miss the chance to test new communication methods or conflict-resolution steps together. You’ll need to wait until you’re at home to apply these skills, which can delay direct feedback and slow your progress.
Partial View
A solo session means the therapist only hears your side of the story. This is still helpful for self-reflection and growth, but a complete view often comes from seeing how both individuals express concerns and handle discussions.
Limited Joint Progress
Solo counselling can spark meaningful change, yet some relationship challenges may require both partners to deeper problem-solving. While you can lay the groundwork by attending alone, significant hurdles—like rebuilding trust or managing unresolved conflicts—often need shared commitment and direct participation.
What to Expect in a Solo Session
At Rosen Couples Counselling, sessions usually last between 6 to 12 appointments, focusing on straightforward approaches and practical exercises. If you’re attending alone:
- Assessment
- Your therapist asks about current concerns, background information, and relationship history.
- This paints a clearer picture of ongoing struggles, even without your partner present.
- Goal Setting
- You identify what you hope to achieve, such as better conflict management or improved emotional regulation.
- Your therapist outlines how each session can help you reach those goals.
- Skill Building
- You learn communication tools designed to lower tension and improve empathy in daily interactions.
- Practicing these techniques on your own can still influence how you interact with your partner.
- Homework Exercises
- Exercises may include journaling, structured conversations, or self-reflection tasks.
- These tasks bridge the gap between therapy sessions and real-life applications.
Questions to Consider
Thinking about attending marriage counselling without your partner can stir up questions about your goals and next steps. Taking a moment to reflect on these considerations can clarify whether solo therapy is right for you.
- Have I Communicated My Reasons to My Partner?
- It can help if your partner knows you’re attending therapy to strengthen the relationship, not to place blame.
- Am I Ready to Share My Learnings at Home?
- This might involve discussing insights gained from therapy and inviting your partner to participate when they feel comfortable.
- Could My Partner Join Later?
- Sometimes, a few solo sessions can open the door to couples work down the line.
- How Will I Track My Progress?
- Consistent progress checks with your therapist ensure that you’re moving toward your goals.
Related Article: Key Questions to Ask in Marriage Counselling
Where Do You Go From Here?
Going to marriage counselling alone can be a worthwhile step, offering room for personal growth and clarity on relationship issues. Even one partner making changes can shift the overall dynamic, setting a healthier tone for future conversations.
If your goal is to work on communication, resolve conflicts, or address concerns like infidelity or anger management, Rosen Couples Counselling can guide you. Get in touch today and discover how solo sessions can support your personal growth—whether or not your partner chooses to join.
